Aug 14, 2012

When is one ready to have kids?

(Daddy blogs)

As you would probably know, I have been approached to blog on a regular basis for maybebaby blog which is a parenthood website managed by I Love Children, a Voluntary Welfare Organisation which seeks to celebrate children and the joy they bring.

And I have reproduced the first article that I have written here:


When is one ready to have kids?

I'm a Daddy, and I love being one. And along with all the stuff that comes with Fatherhood. Yes, even the crappy parts... sometimes literally but that's a different story altogether.

Being my virgin post, I thought I had better use this opportunity to let you get to know a bit more about my family and me first.

You know how some 12-year-old boys grow up aspiring to be doctors, pilots or policemen? For me, I grew up wanting to be a DADDY. I mean, I had made up my mind to be such an awesome Daddy ever since I was young. 

I guess the main reason why I had this notion was because all boys want to grow up to be like their fathers. Every boy loves his father and wants to be able to do what he does, both to honour him, to earn his praise, and to compete with him. So in a way, I wanted to imitate and emulate my Dad.

For the longest time while I was keeping my raging hormones in check, I have already got the swagger on... knowing that some day, there was going to be some kid born into my life who will get his/her mind blown away by my awesome parentage. All I needed was a tee that cried 'World's Best Daddy!' and I was set. What is so difficult about taking care of a bunch of kids? You just hug them, buy them toys, and roar thunderously when they step out of line. I was totally made for this. 

After all, this is what being a Daddy is all about. Right?

And when my eldest son, Ash was born in 2005, I was already getting impatient. But nothing, absolutely nothing, could have prepared me what being a REAL Daddy entailed. Nobody told me about the endless diaper changes, the sleepless nights, or the frustrations and exasperations as a result of his never-ending wails.

So I did the next best thing.

And my second child, Ayd was born in 2006. 19 months apart.

It wasn't exactly planned, but on hindsight the timing couldn't have been better. Growing up, the two boys have been really close... minus the occasional squabbles that is.

But the one thing that Fatherhood has taught me is that - anyone can be a Father, but being a Daddy IS hard work. Being a Daddy is digging your nose and smelling poop because you forgot to wash your hands after the last diaper change. Being a Daddy is staying up all night with the baby, so that the Mummy can get a full night’s sleep every now and then. Being a Daddy is giving them a piggyback ride even after a back-breaking day at work, instead of dismissing them with a 'Later, Daddy's busy now.'

And so, in order to put ourselves to the test once more, Ale was born in 2010.

In reality, she was the final roll of the dice for us because the wifey wanted to have a legitimate reason to buy more hair accessories. Since then, she has taught me that girls are indeed programmed differently from boys but more importantly, she has shown me that the loudest wails do often win.

Frankly, I had never imagined myself to have three kids but stranger things have happened. So here I am now, a truly blessed owner of three cheekiemonkies, two terrapins and one fabulous wife. And yes, I would like to think that I have singlehandedly bumped up the national birth rate as well.

Of course, parenting will always have its share of hits and misses. But at the end of the day, the pleasures of being a Daddy severely outweighs the sacrifices that I had to make. I will share the joys of parenthood that made me embrace Daddy-hood in my subsequent posts but I think it is safe to say that for every joy I receive from being a Daddy, I have learnt something from my kids as well.

But the biggest lesson I have learnt from my Fatherhood journey thus far is this - one can never truly be ready to be a Daddy, or a Mummy. I thought I was ready, but life sure has a quirky sense of humour. Even now, I am still learning as I go along. One thing is for certain though: I am  fiercely dedicated to be the best Daddy that I can be to my three kiddos. And that I am ready to do.


This article first appeared on on 1 August 2012. For more parenthood-related articles, please visit the maybebaby blog.

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